Without friends one can be very lonely. On one occasion David felt this way. “I am like a pelican of the wilderness: I am like an owl of the desert. I watch, and am as a sparrow alone upon the house top” (Psalm 102:6, 7.) The apostle Paul, when he appeared the second time before Nero to answer for his faith, also felt alone: “At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge” (2 Timothy 4:16).

In the parable of the prodigal son, the inevitable result of that young man’s wanton lifestyle was real loneliness. With his money gone, his “fair-weather” friends vanished, he is alone with pigs for his friends and he is so hungry that, “he would fain have filled his belly with the husks that the swine did eat: and no man gave unto him” (Luke 15:16). It is then in his loneliness that he remembers his father and his home so far away. He had learned the hard way the truthfulness of Solomon’s words, “The poor is hated even of his own neighbour: but the rich hath many friends” (Proverbs 14:20).

When Jesus visited the pool of Bethesda, he saw another lonely man. Around the pool were so many hoping almost against hope for healing when the waters of the pool moved, as the people believed, by an angel’s hand. Among those waiting for a miracle was a man who had been infirm for thirty-eight years. Jesus was moved with compassion for him and asked what seemed to be a rather silly question, “Wilt thou be made whole?” The man could have answered very positively by saying “Yes!” But instead, because of his loneliness, he answered negatively by complaining that he was friendless and there was no one to help him into the water. Jesus ignored his complaint and gave him his desire. “Rise, take up thy bed, and walk” (John 5:8). The man obeyed and the power of his Friend strengthened the paralyzed limbs and he walked. He had needed a friend. He had desired a friend to help him and Jesus answered both of his recognized needs, a friend and healing. Friendless, he had been almost hopeless, but with Jesus as his Friend his hope had become a reality.

When John the Baptist was imprisoned, he heard from his disciples of the wonderful work of Jesus. He therefore sent two of his disciples to enquire whether Jesus was the hoped-for Messiah. Jesus did not answer their question directly but said that they should tell John about the things they had both seen and heard. It was to be sufficient. The proof was in the work accomplished.

Then, Jesus began to speak of the importance of the work of John and then made a comparison between John’s work and His own. “John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, He hath a devil. The Son of man came eating and drinking, and they say, Behold a man gluttonous, and a winebibber, a friend of publicans and sinners” (Matthew 11:18, 19).

John had a very special work to do to awaken the conscience of the people. His thorough work and way of life had seemed somewhat austere to many people, but his message had been direct and to the point. It was just what was needed to prepare the way for the Messiah.

Jesus had come close to the people. “Our Lord Jesus Christ came to this world as the unwearied servant of man's necessity. . . . The burden of disease and wretchedness and sin He came to remove. It was His mission to bring to men complete restoration; He came to give them health and peace and perfection of character.”1 Because of His humanity, He understood the needs of humanity and was moved with compassion to supply their need.

To reach as many people as possible, Jesus used the obvious and effective means of approach, the social contact. Wherever there were people there was Jesus; wherever Jesus was, there were people. By His own example He demonstrated the importance of meeting people on the social level. “Christ met the case of every class in the subjects and manner of His teaching. He dined and lodged with the rich and the poor, and made Himself familiar with the interests and occupations of men, that He might gain access to their hearts. The learned and the most intellectual were gratified and charmed with His discourses, and yet they were so plain and simple as to be comprehended by the humblest minds.”2

There were no exclusions to the many classes of society. Jesus accepted the hospitality of all classes. He visited the homes of the poor as well as those of the rich. It mattered not to him whether they were ignorant or learned. He had one purpose and one alone; He sought “to elevate their thoughts from questions of commonplace life to those things that are spiritual and eternal. He gave no license to dissipation, and no shadow of worldly levity marred His conduct; yet He found pleasure in scenes of innocent happiness, and by His presence sanctioned the social gathering.”3

Our greatest Friend did not refuse to mingle with other people in friendly association. If He was invited to a home, He accepted the invitation. “On such occasions every word that He uttered was a savor of life unto life to His hearers; for He made the dinner hour an occasion of imparting many precious lessons adapted to their needs. Christ thus taught His disciples how to conduct themselves when in the company of those who were not religious as well as of those who were. By His own example He taught them that, when attending any public gathering, their conversation need not be of the same character as that usually indulged in on such occasions.”4

Not all friendships may be on an equal level. While Jesus met so many people and was a friend to all, yet He did have special friends. Among His disciples Peter, James, and John appear to have been closer to Him than, apparently, the others. But with no home of His own, there was one place in which He felt at home. The home of Lazarus, Mary, and Martha was a special place to Him. He was ever welcome there and their friendship with Him appears to have been much closer perhaps than with their neighbors and other friends. Christ’s closeness to this family is evidenced by the call from the sisters when Lazarus became ill. They knew that Jesus could help. When Jesus delayed to answer their need immediately they felt a little disappointment and their sorrow at the loss of Lazarus increased. When they eventually met, their sorrow was assuaged by the sympathy of Jesus. He wept. And those watching nearby noticed and said, “Behold how he loved him!” (John 11:36). “Though He was the Son of God, yet He had taken human nature upon Him, and He was moved by human sorrow. His tender, pitying heart is ever awakened to sympathy by suffering. He weeps with those that weep, and rejoices with those that rejoice.”5

“Christ feels the woes of every sufferer. When evil spirits rend a human frame, Christ feels the curse. When fever is burning up the life current, He feels the agony. And He is just as willing to heal the sick now as when He was personally on earth.”6

When Jesus wept at the tomb of Lazarus, He was weeping not alone in sympathy for those weeping for the loss of Lazarus but because many of those weeping with the family would soon turn against Him and desire His death. Their weeping was not sincere. But in the raising of Lazarus Jesus was to demonstrate His power over death and the cause of death, that the rejoicing over the resurrection of Lazarus was to be but a small foretaste of the rejoicing when the true friends of Jesus would see their loved ones returned from the power of death and the grave. His own death and resurrection would provide the power to break forever the power of the enemy and He would rejoice for all eternity with His friends.

In time of war a group of soldiers may be in a difficult situation, and perhaps one who realizes the difficulty will perform some heroic act and possibly lose his own life in the process. This has happened on some occasions when a hand grenade has been lobbed into a trench. In the very few remaining seconds before it explodes a soldier has fallen upon it and been killed. He has died saving his comrades from death or injury. It was during the sad effort of the explorer Scott to reach the South Pole that, when returning to base, they were caught in a blizzard. They were running short of supplies and the four explorers were near the end of their strength. Hoping to ease the burden upon his friends, L. E. G. Oates crawled out into the blizzard to die. Sadly a further blizzard set in and the three remaining explorers also perished.

Of such heroic actions Jesus spoke in His time. “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). Jesus, Himself, sees His people as more than friends. Having one Father we are His brethren and sisters. But He still calls us His friends, and those He would save are also His friends, as He is the Friend of sinners. To provide the means of eternal life for His friends and brethren and sisters, He Himself made the supreme sacrifice of His own life to save ours. Oates and many others have sacrificed life for one or another of their friends but Jesus has done it for His friends and even for His enemies. “For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die. But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him. For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life” (Romans 5:6-10).

Jesus has, and continues to demonstrate His love and friendship for and to us whether we recognize it or not. Every day of our life He pleads the confession of our sins before His Father. He does positive things for us, but what positive things do we do for Him? He gave His life for us - are we prepared to do so for Him? Some have in the past given their life for the love of Jesus and the record of His friends demonstrates that, “They loved not their lives unto the death” (Revelation 12:11). Sometimes for the love of God, “They were stoned, they were sawn asunder, were tempted, were slain with the sword: they wandered about in sheepskins and goatskins; being destitute, afflicted, tormented; . . . they wandered in deserts, and in mountains, and in dens and caves of the earth” (Hebrews 11:37, 38).

But is this all there is to being a friend of Christ? Of itself, such action may be worthless, for the apostle Paul says, “Though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing” (1 Corinthians 13:3). Selfless action without love is insufficient for friendship with Christ. He, Jesus, specifies something more.

About this time of the year, many Christian people will put up brightly colored decorations. There will be bright lights, baubles and tinsel, all in honor of the birth of the One who was made flesh and dwelt among us. They may consider that they love “the Christ child,” but they may not have heard of the other side of the equation. Jesus said, “Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you” (John 15:14). Both their love and their obedience may be of no more value than the tinsel decorations they display. Yes, there are those who have “tinsel” obedience, and also those who have “tinsel” love. Do we love the “tinsel” of the world more than we love the Friend who gave His life for us? Sadly, many who are afraid of “tinsel” obedience rush to the other extreme of “tinsel” love. It is not real, because they are attracted by the lightness of the world around them. They claim they love Jesus, they love to sing about Him, but the eyes are watching the “tinsel.”

The apostle James put it very clearly, “Know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God” (James 4:4). We cannot be the friend of Jesus and the friend of Satan at the same time. It is impossible. Just as water is made of hydrogen and oxygen so friendship with Jesus requires both love and obedience, and the quality of both must be of the highest order.

Jesus recognizes that many of those who try to be friends are in reality servants. They try to do what He says but it is through a sense of duty alone. That is not enough for Him. He says, “Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends” (John 15:15). He has revealed all to us that His Father revealed to Him. He wants us also to have the knowledge of the Father - to know the Father’s love, for that is what Jesus came to reveal.

Jesus wants us to be more than servants and even more than friends. Moses was recognized as a servant of God. The apostle Paul says, “Moses verily was faithful in all his house, as a servant, for a testimony of those things which were to be spoken after; but Christ as a son over his own house; whose house are we, if we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm unto the end” (Hebrews 3:5, 6). It is not enough for Jesus that we be the servants of God. He wants us to be more, even, than friends. Really, He wants us to be children of God throughout eternity, to be with Himself as our elder Brother - sons and daughters of the living God.

Jesus is our Friend. We can trust Him, for He has demonstrated His love for us, a love without measure, a love that burst forth from the tomb in the Garden that He might rise to His Father’s throne and there plead for His friends. Why? “For he careth for you” (1 Peter 5:7).