Saul was the first king of Israel. Coming from the tribe of Benjamin, he was chosen by God and anointed by the prophet Samuel. Unfortunately, his is not the most cheerful of stories. Saul suffered mental anguish largely due to his spiritual weakness as manifested in jealousy, and fear in his stressful position as a king of a great nation. What ultimately led to Saul’s poor mental health and subsequent suicide? It was his disobedience to God’s commands which led to spiritual decline.

One example is found in 1 Samuel 13 when, instead of waiting for the prophet Samuel to perform a burnt offering, he took it upon himself to do so, resulting in God seeking a different man—a man after His own heart to lead His people (King David). Then there was also Saul’s failure in destroying all of the wicked Amalekites and their livestock when commanded to by God (1 Samuel 15).

After being rejected by God, and under pressure from the Philistines threatening to attack him, Saul sought counsel for his upcoming battle with the Philistines from a spiritist medium known as the Witch of Endor (1 Samuel 28). Speaking to spirits, however, is strictly forbidden by God’s law, as we see in His Word, “There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch, Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer [one who inquires of the dead]. For all that do these things are an abomination unto the Lord” (Deuteronomy 18:10–12, emphasis added). As a result, the spirit pretending to be Samuel predicted Saul’s doom in the coming battle against the Philistines (1 Samuel 28:16–19). In response, “then Saul fell straightway all along on the earth, and was sore afraid, because of the words of Samuel: and there was no strength in him” (1 Samuel 28:20).

All of Saul’s stress and anxiety was at a climax. As the Philistines cornered him and killed his sons, Saul was wounded by the archers. Rather than wait to be killed, in desperation, he took his own sword and fell upon it.

Firstly, sin (the transgression of God’s law) is a very grave matter. It is NOT to be taken lightly, and can have severe consequences. Once David became Saul’s servant, it is written that “the Spirit of the Lord departed from Saul” (1 Samuel 16:14). He was then open to the onslaught of tormenting demons. So it can be with us, too. If we continually sin, evil spirits and influences can torment and ruin our own lives, too. Every action has a consequence.

Secondly, immediate, TRUE repentance is essential, or else the soul slowly degrades, despairs, and risks falling away from the Holy Spirit. Saul’s repentance in 1 Samuel 15, when speaking with Samuel, was not truly penitent and did not express a desire for transformation by God. We read in 1 Samuel 15:24 that “Saul said unto Samuel, I have sinned: for I have transgressed the commandment of the Lord, and thy words: because I feared the people, and obeyed their voice.” [Emphasis added.] The qualifier shows how Saul wanted to do things his own way and was not truly sorry for sparing some of the Amalekites and saving their best possessions as offerings and gifts for his people.

Lastly, his life teaches us not to be misguided by naysayers, negative influences, or peer pressure. Saul was negatively influenced by peer pressure from the Israelites. Even if God does not provide direct answers for us when we have tribulation in our lives or need to make difficult decisions, we need to have a firm, unshakeable faith aligned with God’s will.

Some might ask, is Saul going to be in Heaven? The short answer is no—his last action was a sin (suicide). Even if Saul had not killed himself and allowed the Philistines to kill him instead, I still don’t believe he would have made it to Heaven given the way he lived his life in continual disobedience to God. Saul never showed signs of true repentance, unlike his successor, King David.

The renowned Elijah, a great prophet during the reign of King Ahab, was able to perform various miracles with God’s help, including feeding the widow in Zarephath and restoring the widow’s son who fell ill and died (1 Kings 17:17–23).

Elijah challenged the wicked King Ahab who was promoting Baal worship (worship of pagan gods) in the northern kingdom of Israel. Unlike the 450 prophets of Baal on Mount Carmel, Elijah was able to successfully prove who the true God is when his call for fire upon his burnt offering was immediately answered.

Despite his great faith in God, we still see he had moments of discouragement and weakness.

When Ahab told his wife Jezebel what Elijah had done (seizing the prophets of Baal and killing them), she sent a messenger threatening to have him killed. Because Jezebel had killed other prophets, her threat here was a real one.

Anxious, Elijah flees to the desert in despair. The Bible says in 1 Kings 19:4, “But he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a juniper tree: and he requested for himself that he might die; and said, It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life; for I am not better than my fathers.”

He felt like he was a failure since the nation of Israel was still stuck in idolatry and sin. How many times have we felt this way in life—feeling as if we haven’t done enough, as if we are unworthy to be vessels for God? Does it make us feel ashamed? When we are discouraged or depressed, we tend to fall deeper in our shame.

Even faithful Elijah was capable of being shaken to the point of being suicidal. This is the man who was so important to God that he was translated to Heaven in a whirlwind—a fate shared only with Enoch.

What helped him recover? Trust in God . God never left Elijah to be in situations or temptations too great to bear. He provided him with food and provisions multiple times (with the widow, and when he was in the desert). With prayer and faith, he was able to demonstrate the true God on the altar, and to bring rain to the drought-stricken land. He gave Elijah the strength to endure numerous trials, rather than removing the threats completely. Jezebel did not simply disappear from his life. But God, in providing for him, showed His care and comfort for His child.

It’s completely understandable to be caught in despair sometimes, even as Christians. Just because you are a man or woman of faith, does not mean you won’t have moments of doubt, fear, or hopelessness. You may be down for days, or weeks, or months, or years. Fear is paralyzing. The enemy wants you to stay down, stay anxious, stay depressed. He wants you dead. But trust in the Lord, because He will never leave or forsake you. By trusting God, Elijah was able to be delivered from difficult situations and not be overcome.

“Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the Lord for ever: for in the Lord Jehovah is everlasting strength” (Isaiah 26:3, 4).

What did the apostle Paul say about God’s strength when we are weak? “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong” (2 Corinthians 12:9, 10).

Even when we are weak, God is strong. When we feel weak, God’s power can shine even brighter in us, as it did for Elijah. The Lord is our only way to know true hope.

Job is described to be “blameless and upright, one who feared God and turned away from evil” (Job 1:1, ESV). He had great possessions and was regarded as the greatest of all the people of the east. When God allowed Satan to test his servant’s faith, he lost everything—possessions, livestock, servants, wealth, and children. Satan also struck Job with horribly painful sores from head to toe. How did Job react to this?

We read that “Job arose, and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground, and worshipped, And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord” (Job 1:20, 21).

Job had a deep understanding of God’s loving character. He understood that God blesses, and that he also allows suffering. But he was not without anguish or hopelessness. For 7 days, he grieved together with his “friends” Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar. Then he lamented his birth, saying, “Let the day perish on which I was born. . . . Let gloom and deep darkness claim it” (Job 3:3, 5).

Have you ever considered how you would react in Job’s shoes? Could you remain faithful? How upset at God would you be? Would you still believe God was a fair, just, and loving God?

Worse, it seemed like NOBODY was on Job’s side! Not his wife, who told him to curse God and die. Nor were his friends. While they did mourn with him, they also implied that it was Job’s actions, sins, and wickedness which caused his suffering. Their judgment does not come off as something comforting. Eliphaz asks, “Remember, I pray thee, who ever perished, being innocent? or where were the righteous cut off? Even as I have seen, they that plow iniquity, and sow wickedness, reap the same” (Job 4:7, 8). While it is an easy and human thing to do, it is unwise to judge others for their situations.

When there was nobody else, God was there for Job. Rather than giving a direct answer to why Job had to suffer so much, God reminded Job of His great creative power. He reminded him of who created the earth, formed the sea, created animals, so on and so forth. Job’s story teaches us that we cannot fully understand God’s plans and ways. Although this can cause a lot of anxiety, depression, and hopelessness in us, especially during difficult trials, the right thing to do is to humble ourselves before God even when we cannot understand why we might have to suffer sometimes. “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways saith the Lord” (Isaiah 55:8).

“A feeling of assurance is not to be despised; we should praise God for it; but when your feelings are depressed, do not think that God has changed. Praise Him just as much, because you trust in His word, and not in feelings. You have covenanted to walk by faith, not to be controlled by feelings. Feelings vary with circumstances....Walk before God by faith, and rest fully upon His promises. Jesus says, “Lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world.’Matthew 28:20.”1

Job did not allow his emotions to control his life or his fate. Rather, he walked by faith and principle. This kept him strong in his suffering.

Furthermore, Job did not suffer needlessly. Romans 5 partially explains God’s plan for us in our sufferings here on earth. Suffering through trials builds character, and may be His way of pruning us to TRUST and LOVE HIM MORE. Romans 5:1 says “Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.” Faith makes us justified, or righteous, before God. It helps us understand His character more—one of perfect peace and love.

Christ is the One “by whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us” (Romans 5:2–5).

Hope is defined as “a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen.” It’s a decent definition, but it comes from a worldly perspective which includes our own personal biases. Our hopes may not always be for the best. Unfortunately, worldly hope falls short. Because it leaves room for doubt and uncertainty; it is not reassuring to one who is anxious, depressed, or contemplating suicide.

In contrast, biblical hope—hope, with God at the foundation, is a confident assurance—that is, a promise that WILL be, WITHOUT DOUBT, FULFILLED. Biblical hope is not merely a feeling, it’s a reality grounded in Christ. The apostle Paul refers to “Jesus Christ which is our hope” (1 Timothy 1:1).

Christ, as a perfect being, cannot lie. If He promises it, it will happen. The apostle declares, “Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope” (Romans 15:13).

As we suffer, we build character, and thus, a HOPE towards eternal life. Christ is the one who enables this hope. There is no other way to find it but in Him. Often, we need to have patience and wait for Him. The Bible tells us, “The Lord is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him. It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord” (Lamentations 3:25, 26). Having to wait develops our faith and hope.

Stand firm, knowing that Jesus does not define us based on our sins, but rather on our repentance and our willingness to change. If we wallow in our worthlessness and sins, then we are not trusting in Christ's role as our intercessor, and our advocate before the Father.

Jesus is a Saviour, not an accuser. God has not abandoned you. Jesus’s blood is the atonement for our life. It covers our sins.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE. God promises that He will never leave us nor forsake us. (Hebrews 13:5.)

The best way to know hope better, is to know Christ better. His character and example for us to follow is summarized very well: “We then that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves. Let every one of us please his neighbour for his good to edification. For even Christ pleased not himself; but, as it is written, The reproaches of them that reproached thee fell on me. For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hope” (Romans 15:1–4).

We must build our character here on earth, to prepare for Heaven. Looking to Christ strengthens us and clears our mind of anxiety and depression so we can achieve this higher goal.

“Through the merits of Christ, through His righteousness, which by faith is imputed unto us, we are to attain to the perfection of Christian character. Our daily and hourly work is set forth in the words of the apostle: “Looking unto Jesus the Author and Finisher of our faith.” While doing this our minds become clearer and our faith stronger, and our hope is confirmed; we are so engrossed with the view of His purity and loveliness and the sacrifice He has made to bring us into agreement with God that we have no disposition to speak of doubts and discouragements.”2

“God looks into the tiny seed that He Himself has formed, and sees wrapped within it the beautiful flower, the shrub, or the lofty, wide-spreading tree. So does He see the possibilities in every human being. We are here for a purpose. God has given us His plan for our life, and He desires us to reach the highest standard of development.

“He desires that we shall constantly be growing in holiness, in happiness, in usefulness. All have capabilities which they must be taught to regard as sacred endowments, to appreciate as the Lord’s gifts, and rightly to employ. He desires the youth to cultivate every power of their being, and to bring every faculty into active exercise. He desires them to enjoy all that is useful and precious in this life, to be good and to do good, laying up a heavenly treasure for the future life.

“It should be their ambition to excel in all things that are unselfish, high, and noble. Let them look to Christ as the pattern after which they are to be fashioned. The holy ambition that He revealed in His life they are to cherish—an ambition to make the world better for their having lived in it. This is the work to which they are called.”3

Come to Jesus just as you are. As broken as you may feel at any moment in time, run to Him like a child who has lost their way and needs a parent to comfort them. Seek refuge in His arms. Lean on others who fear God and who genuinely care about you. Lean on your support system. Practice gratitude, daily. Pray to God often and maintain a close connection with Jesus, the Living Water.

Even though the world is filled with darkness, find the bright spots. Pray that you can also be a light for others someday, as this will help not just yourself, but others with whom you come into contact. Remember how you might have felt when someone talked to you in your darkest hour. Proverbs 4:18 explains that “the path of the just is as the shining light, that shineth more and more unto the perfect day.”

The gospel mission is reflecting the light of Christ—gently guiding people away from insignificant worldly matters to a life in Heaven for eternity. What does sharing light cost you?

“Let us remember that everyone has some dark spot in his experience. Let us do all we can to bring cheerfulness and hope into the lives of others. What a blessing this will be to them. In their turn they will speak words of good cheer to others to bring sunshine into their hearts.”4

The apostle bids us, “Be careful [i.e., full of care] for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6, 7).

Jesus gives the assurance, “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” (John 14:27).

I pray that we do not give up. I pray that our loved ones do not give up on us. Even if we are neglected, afflicted, or abandoned by someone or some group here on earth, know that there is hope because of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour, who has saved so many from darkness and despair. As Jesus overcame trial and tribulation on earth with the help of the Father, so can we. Before His death and resurrection, Jesus explained that we WILL have tribulation, but in that same verse He also says, “be of good cheer, for I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).

May the Lord help us to remain faithful and Know Hope—a hope of eternal life—which begins here and now as we grow our relationship with Jesus here on earth.