July- September
After the Sabbath school lesson one Sabbath morning, the leader stood up and expressed his dissatisfaction about how many young people do not like to participate in the Sabbath school activities. They do not seem eager to read the Bible references found in the Sabbath Bible Lessons or to offer comments or questions when the lesson is being discussed. His words were met with complete silence.
When the service was over, one young man met a brother and said to him, “I desire to work for God, I would love to teach the lessons, I would love to pray in the church, and sing before the congregation, and I even have some questions to ask for the lesson. But I am too shy, so I cannot do these things. I feel like I should just stop coming to church!”
Only those who have experienced what shyness is can understand what this young man had just said.
Shyness is being timid, diffident, nervous, and uncomfortable in the company of others.
Quite frankly, a shy person is in real trouble. He or she seems to be more or less like a prisoner. Since such person is afraid to express his or her real feelings for fear of being laughed at, or to avoid being disgraced, he or she often accepts situations that he or she doesn’t want—all because of shyness.
A shy person misses so many opportunities and loses the joy of making new friends.
Does shyness affect only young people?
There was a special occasion which occurred here in Africa—it was a very big event at which the organizers needed a “big” man to address the people. Therefore they decided to use a man who had studied in the United States of America for many years.
Unfortunately nobody knew that this man was very shy and nervous. When he stood before the people to read his address, he was so nervous that he could not even read the headlines. He was shivering until the papers fell from his hands, and some people came and accompanied him to his seat.
Yes, shyness is a real problem. One young man came to me weeping because of this ugly trait. But after telling him my past experience, he gained courage.
When I was growing up as a youth, I was so shy that I preferred to die rather than to live. I disgraced myself many times whenever I was called to do anything in front of the people. I could not read any Bible quotation, no matter how short it was. I absented myself from school on any day I had been assigned to do anything in front of the classroom.
What was the cause of this problem to me? It was an inferiority complex. I was comparing myself with others. Thus, I wanted to do things the way they did, without knowing that God made us different. I never realized that nobody is perfect. All of us have our strengths and our weaknesses.
Yes, shyness can be overcome. We have examples from the Bible about people who suffered from a similar condition, but they overcame as they depended upon God for strength.
When God sent Moses to Egypt to deliver His people, he refused for the following reasons: “Moses said unto the Lord, O my Lord, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue” (Exodus 4:10).
Little did Moses know what he would accomplish in the Lord’s cause. This very Moses who could not stand before Pharaoh in Egypt led the assembly of over one million people for years.
Saul was the first king of Israel. He was actually so shy that when he was appointed to be king, he went and hid himself. He was too shy to stand and speak before the people. “When [Samuel] had caused the tribe of Benjamin to come near by their families, the family of Matri was taken, and Saul the son of Kish was taken: and when they sought him, he could not be found. Therefore they inquired of the Lord further, if the man should yet come thither. And the Lord answered, Behold, he hath hid himself among the stuff. And they ran and fetched him” (1 Samuel 10:21–23). Amazingly, this very Saul eventually led the children of Israel to victory.
The truth is that there are lessons to learn about shyness.
Shyness could be a means in the hands of God to stop a person from going deep into a worldly association.
He also uses this means to show us that we can do nothing without Him. Thus, He wants us to depend completely on Him for strength all the time. Experience has shown that 70% of those who have worked for God or who are working for Him today were once very shy.
In my church where I worship, nobody laughs at someone who makes mistakes.
I remembered one day when a sister came forward to sing a song, but in front of the congregation, she was just standing looking at the ceiling. When the members realized that she was nervous, they began to sing a nice song which the sister joined in singing, and finally she came out victoriously. I believe the church can also encourage those who are shy to participate in church activities.
I want to tell every youth who is shy, that if I can stand today in the presence of thousands and give lectures, you too can do it.
If I can speak in seminars in many places today, you, too, can do it.
All you need to do is:
1. Promise God that you will never misuse this privilege by using your boldness to do things that will not bring glory to His holy name.
2. Learn to come early to every meeting. As you see the people coming in, greet them one by one if at all possible.
3. Learn to love the church members and remember their names. Almost everyone loves to see someone he or she is not acquainted with calling him or her by name.
4. Determine never to say anything against your brother or your sister in the faith.
5. Learn to appreciate what others do. As a result, others will appreciate you as well. The word of God says it better: “Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets” (Matthew 7:12).
6. Always read the Word of God, so as to become conversant with the Bible and its references.
“Seventy percent of those who work for god were once very shy.”
7. Whenever you are asked to present anything before the people, go back home and prepare yourself very well. Read the subject over and over. This will help you to present things nicely before the people.
8. Speak good things about others. Appreciate their effort. “In lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves” (Philippians 2:3).
9. Dress neatly and nicely. Do your best to look good.
10. Practice making eye contact with others, beginning with children.
Those points being said, no matter what we say about how to overcome this problem, the truth is that only God can help us to overcome this problem. Hear what He told Moses, “And the Lord said unto him, Who hath made man’s mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the Lord? Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and teach thee what thou shalt say” (Exodus 4:11, 12).
Therefore pray about it. Do not worry about what people say about you. Serve God faithfully and put self aside. “Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6).